thot and die. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fullthottle) wrote2019-11-24 11:58 am
fullthottle) wrote2019-11-24 11:58 am
TL;CR MEME
1. Comment with your character.
2. Receive comments from others.
3. Reply to their comments with long ballads and explanations of your characters' relationship throughout the game.
4. Endure everyone else reading your comment like the vultures they are.
Marie with Tamamo
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And somehow it worked. Tamamo always viewed Illumi as the pragmatic sort who would cut her down if it suited his needs, but she's exactly the same, which is why knowing he might betray her down the line never bothered her. Sometimes a friendship is business first, everything else after, and from her end it gave Tamamo room to breathe and tease him. Nothing to lose when you know where you stand with the other person, and all.
It does mean he got a chance to see her at her most cutthroat, as well; Tamamo is not all that nice of an individual. She behaved in-game for many reasons, but I think the aborted thread about Dimitri is one that stands out to me, because Tamamo really can treat people like objects that are hers. If only for a moment, she showed that side to Illumi, knowing he'd be one of the few in the group to understand that really fucked-up logic. And it's why once Illumi was gone, Tamamo did feel a little ... lonely, in a sense, like she had lost someone who would Get Her.
So she wants to come back and save him because he really did offer him a type of companionship very few other people could. It wasn't healthy -- in fact, I could see them being horrible for each other in the long run, feeding into their more negative tendencies -- but it was theirs and she appreciates Illumi for it.
Even if he still sucks at dressing himself.
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Thankfully, Shiraishi did not shut the fuck up, which meant Tamamo had to just deal with him, and frankly she's... not upset about it anymore. Towards the last weeks he was alive, Tamamo did wish she could understand him a little better. Not only did he make for good conversation with his banter, but he was useful during trials, and she appreciated his pragmatic viewpoints. It meant she could be pragmatic as well without the potential side-effect of hurting his feelings for her honesty (not that she would have cared, but Tamamo knows sometimes humans need a lot of coddling to do their jobs).
So him dying was a shock and perhaps the first real moment of distress Tamamo felt in the game, knowing she could lose the people she cared for. She did not like it. But in turn it made her more determined to see herself and her remaining CR live to the end, so in that way, Shiraishi probably helped keep Tamamo's ass in gear and her eye on the prize.
... And she maybe, MAYBE, will let him touch her ears in their farewell thread. Maybe. As a thank-you for putting up with her nonsense. She knows that she can also be a lot.
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I just. HNNGH?? I did not expect any of this mess when I first slammed into the mingle thread. Not only was I canonblind for Junpei but I had only started rping Tamamo that very week, so watching everything just fit neatly into place when I barely knew what the fuck I was doing was an experience.
But they are so, so good? I've told you this many times already but Junpei really is the perfect type of Master for Tamamo. She is someone who needs a person with conviction, with drive and goals, who won't bend easily under pressure, but is still able to retain a certain amount of softness in their souls because that is what brings out her best qualities -- and Junpei really did provide all of that. A lot of Tamamo's success in the game is due to the fact that Junpei helped temper a lot of her nastier aspects. This poor broken lamb really saved everyone, just by keeping his wayward Servant in check.
Because at first she was fine with using him, it was mutually beneficial, but as time went on she wanted to see Junpei succeed for his own self, and that occasionally meant removing herself from danger. And being careful. And looking after the health of other people. LIKE WHEN I SAY HE BROUGHT OUT THE BEST IN HER, I am not kidding.
It did, hilariously, mean there were periods where she felt very vulnerable around him -- he could have hurt her so much if he ever wanted to, and she'd have almost no defenses besides physical retaliation. She knew it and it scared her, and it's why she wanted to cut off their pact when she realized she couldn't emotionally discard him, and (at that point) he didn't know that she was the spirit of an evil ass youkai. It would have been in his rights to backpedal upon finding out about her True Name and her origins, but he didn't do any of that? He just forgave her for being quick to the trigger and promised to find a way to save her, and that is honestly more than anyone has ever done for her.
So she is just. stupidly loyal to him at this point, and would deadass cross time and space to come to his aid. "Soulmate" is a really good word to describe them -- remember how she said that even though it's technically impossible, sometimes a person has such a profound effect on a Heroic Spirit that it affects their origin and they seem to retain phantom feelings of realities that are long past? Yeah... yeah.
Congrats on your eternal fox wife, loser.
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Wow this sure is a lot lmao
I mean to a point I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT THEIR CR IS. Are they in love? Are they just okay being two immortal souls who are spirit married? It's so hard to tell and I think it's because they are old and have seen so much, especially with Hige being a sword at his core and Tamamo is... Tamamo. They work so well 99.9999% of the time because of their backgrounds but it's also that .00001% that has me constantly shrieking at the ceiling in fright.
Okay but my screaming aside, Tamamo has decided that she indeed... loves this stupid sword. Actual dokis. Maybe not the way she expected it to happen -- in fact, Tamamo would say loving him hurts a lot. He is deeply affectionate and caring towards her, and yet in the same breath his nature sometimes means he can miss obvious cues and hurt her feelings. He offers affection unhindered to pretty much everyone. AND THAT IS NOT EVEN MENTIONING HOW MUCH HE CARES ABOUT HIS BROTHER, which at some points led to Tamamo trying to flatline her expectations so she wouldn't be hurt by disappointment...
But it is a testament to how she feels about him that Hige gets such a free pass, when Tamamo would straight-up kill others for doing even a fraction of what he does.
And it comes back to him being a sword, and them just having such a profound immortal-type relationship. Hige makes her feel understood and appreciated in a way no one else could give her -- like, their fanfic was still one of the most romantic things she's ever done, and that he has continued to be heartfelt throughout his promise to find her really does mean the world to her. Her story is one that was meant to be a tragedy - knowing he'd work to save both her past and future despite her evil nature is just, peak romance.
And my god this is terrible but she is admittedly a little happy to know that at the end of it all, he needs her. A promise is a promise, and she'll do everything in her power to make sure he returns to his brother, but she is a selfish fox who just wants to be loved. If this is how it's going to happen, so be it. She'll help keep his pieces from shattering further and stay by his side for eternity... and keep telling everyone they're married while not explaining a fuckin monogamy to him.
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So. WWX is one of those characters that Tamamo purposefully refused to sleep with -- not because she thought he was ugly, but simply due to the nature of their relationship. It was probably the most "sibling-like" one she had, filled with teasing and banter and just two gremlins trying to suppress their feelings while surviving on a sex ship. She really, really appreciated his upbeat attitude, even if many times she suspected it was just as much a coping strategy as anything else...
But hey, she was much the same? Tamamo often acted wild for the sole purpose of keeping everyone else on their toes, so she wasn't going to criticize WWX's way of doing things. And especially towards the latter weeks, she found herself depending on him keeping a more even keel while the rest of their group slowly but surely disintegrated under pressure. There's a reason she asked him to look after Junpei when they were having their spat -- because she knew he'd do a good job at cheering him up and keeping Junpei focused.
Tamamo will offer trust as she sees fit when it comes to herself, but trusting someone with her Master? That's a whole 'nother level.
Also finding out about his backstory was a trip because Tamamo honestly did not expect for them to share that level of kinship? When Tamamo's memory revealed she'd once been a grudge-filled spirit who just killed humans out of grief and revenge, she truly thought WWX would be the one to hate her, or at least pull back on the friendliness... and instead it turns out he understood what she had gone through in his own way. That's really the thread that cemented the "comrade in arms" relationship she feels towards him.
So the fact they didn't get the happy ending they wanted? No big deal. They're both utter fools who will smash the world to get what they want, and she believes WWX will walk with her straight into hell if that's what it takes.
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Since yeah, in the beginning, Tamamo bugged Kagachi for the fun of it. He was such a Straight Man to her antics and she thought him amusing whenever she riled him up. She is a fox! She needs entertainment! And Tamamo can be terrible able using people for her own amusement.
... tbh I'm not even sure when that started changing, and she found herself enjoying their quiet moments together. But they just fell into a rhythm that was their own, usually accompanied with tea and discussion, and she really did appreciate the blunt, pragmatic, and exasperated companionship he offered on its own merits. It's why she would go Full Tamamo at him; she wanted him to emote and to live, to enjoy the moment while he still had it. Her being manic at him was sometimes her way of being affectionate.
But ultimately she respected his conviction and his choices -- didn't always agree and wished he'd be a lot more selfish for his own sake, but respect is respect and it's why Tamamo backed off from convincing him to live. He was human but honestly she treated him more like he was his own divine spirit, outside of her Authority.
So she will miss him deeply and with more affection than he probably realizes but sometimes a goodbye really is a goodbye. Even still, she refuses to forget him, as then he would truly be dead to the world.
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But Edelgard? Tamamo would not fuck around with Edelgard. She could tell this was a woman who would do whatever necessary to see her goals reached, and didn't care about being liked along the way. Which is why Tamamo decided to decrease chances of friction by staying out of the way -- and then later to go full throttle, regardless of if it came down to a fight or just them working together. Given their roles in the game it ended up becoming the latter (to her relief, honestly), but even still Tamamo was always ready for a brawl... and yet that made her like Edelgard even more.
Basically they were two apex predators pacing around in the same cage who happened to work together instead of fistfighting to the death, and that is beautiful to me.
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Except Tamamo is full of bullshit and is just as cutthroat and blunt as Zero, and once that was established between them, Tamamo found herself loosening up around her roommate. In particular, Tamamo gets along with people who won't immediately judge her for having been a grudge-filled demon, and Zero is... well, she is Zero. Crude and crass and blunt, but deep down maybe has something of a heart to her.
Before she knew it, Tamamo looked forward to them just shittalking their companions and hanging out in their room, which is why in the end, it was probably the most honest friendship she had among their CR. Losing Zero meant losing the easy companionship that had become a staple of her life on the ship, and the only reason she isn't more salty about it is she knows Zero was an Intoner who might have destroyed her entire world. So in a way, Zero dying is as close to a happy ending as she was going to get.
-- But yeah honestly if Tamamo realized it was demon!Tonbo who set Zero up to die then she would not feel bad about him being stuck in the land of the dead. YEAH SHE KNOWS IT WAS A DEMON AND NOT POOR TONBO but Tamamo is a salty, evil bitch who plays favorites. That was her roommate.
Re: Marie with Tamamo
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She was just... refreshing? Someone who struck Tamamo as kind and gentle and filled with life, and reminded Tamamo a little bit of her time as a goddess, when she was fascinated with the unyielding will of humanity. It's why she enjoyed spending time with her, talking about their homes and trying to find normalcy on the ship. Looking back on it now, Escha was the person who set the stage for Tamamo to give humans another chance -- when faced with her own death, Escha went to it with dignity and without regrets, and even explained to Tamamo what was happening behind the scenes.
That meant a lot to Tamamo, who is so used to being cast aside for someone else's narrative (and also had been going through some emotional pains in other threads as well; my god did Escha save Junpei a beating). She never forgot that Escha tried to protect her, and deep down Tamamo is perhaps the most bitter about her fate. Yes, she wants all of the dead to come back, but for Escha in particular it just. galls her that this girl doesn't get the happy ending she deserves.
But it's fine bc Tamamo hates to lose and will try to regain her tails so she can pull them all out of demon purgatory. IT'S FINE (???).